Written by: Derek N.H. Notman
How to lean into being a dad to help your kids manage their money
Time tends to fly most when we are working, having fun, and being a parent.
As a dad I want to be "cool" AKA "money" in the eyes of my son. I want him to look up to me, trust me, and learn from me.
Being a dad is an awesome responsibility, but also an awesome opportunity.
The next generation, our kids, will learn how to use, feel, and interact with their money whether we like it or not, so here are my 3 top tips to lean into being a dad so your kids not only think you're money, but know how to use it.
I can only come at this from the "dad" perspective but I know in my bones that moms are equally as important and influential in how our kids learn to interact with money.
Tip 1: Talk about money with your kids
Earlier this year I was lucky enough to have found the book The Intentional Father, by Jon Tyson. It opened up my mind to the awesome responsibility, obligation, and opportunity I have to teach my son as much as possible before he enters the real world.
Unlike my upbringing where money was taboo to talk about, I've made it a point to be very open about the topic of money. A lot of being a dad is simply having meaningful conversations with our kids, explaining to them all matter of things in life. One of them should be Money. Since my son was about 5 I've made it a point to have open dialogue with him about money. We discuss high level family finances, what things cost, the importance of saving, how to use debt responsibly, investing, taxes, cash flow, and exchanging ones time to earn money.
This should be a conversation too. Let them ask questions. Let them know it is a safe topic to talk about. Put boundaries on it and explain the importance on keeping certain things private, but overall it should be an open topic.
As dads if we don't talk about money we are sending an equally powerful message to our kids, which one do you want to send?
Tip 2: Show your kids how to use money
Whether we realize it or not our kids watch our every move from virtually day one. They learn from our non-verbals but also watch our actions when we do all manner of things, including how we think about and spend our money.
It's one thing to talk to my son about money, but why not show him? Like my son and I did on this zip line, I could have told him all about the experience but until he experienced it for himself it would never have the same meaning.
Leading by example and sharing experiences will help ingrain the money habits & ideas you want them to have. Whether it's showing them how interest looks on a bank statement or showing them how to calculate ROI on a small dog treats business (yes, he did this), showing your kids how to use money is a great next step to talking about it.
Tip 3: Teach your kids that money is only a tool for what's really important in life
Having more money for money's sake is a blackhole one can never fill. Money is a tool. We use it to accomplish, get, do, etc. what is important to us in life. To be the ultimate master of money one must know it's a tool and how to use it, otherwise it will control you. As dads we owe it to our kids to make this very clear to them so they don't become a slave to money and all the negative things that come with it.
Go get a drill bit. Tell your kid that they don't want the drill bit. Show them they want the hole it makes. Then tell them money is the same thing as the drill bit!
The clock is ticking
By the time your kid reaches 12 years of age you will have already spent ~85% of your time with them, for your entire life. Let that sink it. Our time to be with and teach our kids is limited so make the most of it and good things will happen.
Lean into being a dad and surround yourself with other dads to strive to be the best dad you can be, we can all learn from each other. This is one of the reasons I co-founded REBL Dads, a global mastermind for dadpreneurs. It takes a village as they say.
By applying the 3 tips above you will hopefully notice some important outcomes. First, your kids will have fond memories of you. They will appreciate your guidance and support, they will love you for it. Secondly, they will have a solid financial literacy foundation greater than anything they can get from TikTok. Thirdly, they will think you're the coolest "Money" dad around!
What is your top tip to help your kids improve their financial literacy?